“Only selfish people commit suicide” World Suicide Prevention Day.

“Only selfish people commit suicide”

Today is World Suicide Prevention Day.

Every year organizations and communities around the world come together to raise awareness of how we can create a world where fewer people die by suicide.

This year the international theme is ‘Creating Hope Through Action’

Why is there such an undercurrent of taboo associated with suicidal people?

Do you think anyone who commits suicide actually wants to die? I think it’s more that they don’t want to live the life they have and can’t see a way out. They are consumed by the feelings of helplessness and hopelessness!

Ever heard the saying… “people who threaten suicide are just attention seekers” Maybe they are actually calling out for help, and maybe getting that help makes the difference between life and death!

Another stigma I’ve often heard throughout my career is “people who threaten suicide ain’t serious!!”

I’ve read facts which clearly show how people who kill themselves have often told someone how they feel their live is not worth living, they don’t feel they have a future or they can’t see what purpose they have in life. Some may have even outrightly said they feel suicidal. It’s in those very moments that people need to be taken seriously and NOT shunned or judged!

Suicide is a consequence of a split second decision or an impulse as little as minutes before it happens.

Although someone may often feel low and suicidal, but being ‘actively suicidal’ is always temporary.

By actively suicidal I mean when someone has a handful of pills ready to overdose, or they are preparing to hang themselves, or are stood at a station wondering when best to jump in front of a moving train etc.

Let’s try gauge how serious suicide actually is..

World Health Organization (WHO) 2019 show that 700,000 committed suicide worldwide – that’s one person every 40 seconds.

The Office For National Statistics has shared that:

• In 2019, there were 5,691 suicides registered in England and Wales,

• Around three-quarters of registered deaths in 2019 were among men (4,303 deaths), which follows a consistent trend back to the mid-1990s.

• The England and Wales male suicide rate of 16.9 deaths per 100,000 is the highest since 2000 and remains in line with the rate in 2018; for females, the rate was 5.3 deaths per 100,000, consistent with 2018 and the highest since 2004.

• Males aged 45 to 49 years had the highest age-specific suicide rate (25.5 deaths per 100,000 males); for females, the age group with the highest rate was 50 to 54 years at 7.4 deaths per 100,000.

• Despite having a low number of deaths overall, rates among the under 25s have generally increased in recent years, particularly 10- to 24-year-old females where the rate has increased significantly since 2012 to its highest level with 3.1 deaths per 100,000 females in 2019.

Suicide tendencies does not discriminate, and I really want for people to get rid of any stigma in their minds around suicidal people!

I doubt the following celebs would come to mind…who have shared they felt suicidal at certain points.

Micheal Jackson Elton John Britney Spears Drew Carey Owen Wilson Halle Berry Tina Turner Eminem Elizabeth Taylor Mike Tyson Walt Disney even .. Princess Diana attempted suicide,seriously, the list goes on…!!

Bottom line is, regardless of triggers… Mental health can effect absolutely anyone!

I know all this, because I have been “actively suicidal” twice this year, with one serious attempt made. I had a friend travel over an hour in the mornings to check that I’m still alive, to get me out of bed, to make me eat a healthy breakfast and above all to show me another way out of my darkness. This went on for months and months until I started coping myself. I was lucky.

I write these posts because I am now actively healing, and raising awareness is part of my spiritual journey and therefore want to give advice from my perspective.

One of the biggest clues with myself was that I could reminisce about the past, but I couldn’t speak or think about the future.

If you want to help someone who maybe feeling this low, then firstly don’t be scared to ask outright if they are suicidal, don’t be afraid of the reaction. You could actually lift a huge weight off their shoulders, you could make their voice feel heard, their feelings and emotions validated and It could be the release they need.

It’s so important to listen to someone without judgement, regardless of religion or your spiritual views! Don’t interrupt the talking, let them talk and again, truly listen.

Don’t say things like “you are going to hurt your parents, your kids, your friends etc” cause they already know that, but they are hurting too much and want a way out of that pain.

Don’t get angry, shout or try to compound them with fear, guilt or shame. That happened to me and I recoiled inwards so fast it became difficult to ask for help again.

For Gods sake, avoid cliches like “you have got so much to live for” “compare your life to those with disabilities, or those who have less then you” etc. All that talk is useless in that pain because the person is most likely consumed with feelings of helplessness, and hopelessness! It just is not going to help!

Instead of saying “call me if you need me” why don’t you knock on the door as it can make a world of difference, after all..actions speak louder then words!

Before offering to support someone, check in with yourself. Are you in a position and willing to help the other person who is at a vulnerable low? Are you wanting to help so you can tell the world what a great friend you are…. or do you genuinely want to help? You will be surprised how many people are more about their own ego!!

Do you realise the extent of rejection that can be felt if you don’t follow up with your words of support?

If the situation is tougher then you thought, it’s ok, you can get other help for your friend via other sources… Just DONT play the avoidance card because that’s outright cruel and can be detrimental!

Involve other people and have your own support bubble, so you are not alone and don’t feel responsible.

Call on support of a close friend, Samaritans, a GP, a helpline etc, but also remember this truth… if the person dies, do not blame yourself… bottom line is you are trying to help but your not responsible for someone else’s life!

Let’s rise above the stigma around suicide and spread more love and compassion in the world, keep talking, because suicide really is preventable!!!

Kiran Sehra

Thank you Kiran Sehra for your article contribution on World Suicide Prevention Day 2023. We know the original article is from 2021, however Kiran asked us to re-share this article as it is still pertinent today.

Find the original article here: https://www.asianwomenmeanbusiness.com/suicidal-prevention-day-2021/